Our Residential Resilience project has received some positive feedback from it’s clients lately, and we want to highlight one particular story.
The team of Residential Resilience support homeless people in a temporary accommodation setting who are struggling with their mental health and day to day life.
This story covers the work of Sue, one of our members of staff, who has given her all and more to the clients she sees, just like the rest of the team. Working with homeless clients in a temporary accommodation setting can be difficult on times and have many barriers and challenges.
But this doesn’t stop the team from going above and beyond to see a positive change in their clients.
Here is the story of one client who has been supported by the Residential Resilience team, which had such a positive outcome it was impossible not to share.
*Trigger Warning* Some features in this story may contain wording, actions and emotions that some people may find upsetting.
To protect the identity of the person, we have removed any names, details and edited this story slightly to respect the rights of confidentiality to anyone involved.
MY JOURNEYIn 2019 I was diagnosed with a severe illness after I had found lumps in certain parts of my body. I went through chemotherapy and as well as losing my hair, I lost my self-worth, I was bitter and gave up caring about everything including my family.When I had the all clear in a few years later, I was lost, the treatment had been such a big part of my life that now I had a void.That’s when I started drinking. To fill my days, I would binge to the point where I would drink for days and lose weekends not knowing where I had been.My relationship with my long-term girlfriend fell apart and I lost her and my daughter who was then 3 years old. This is when I became homeless, I was drinking, I didn’t care.I moved into supported accommodation early 2022 and spent my days sleeping and nights drinking with the boys. Nothing mattered, weekends were a blur.I had met Sue from Cwm Taf Morgannwg a few times when she had been at project doing groups with the boys, she was always happy and always invited me to sit and I always said I had an appointment and would leave quickly, this was a lie, I didn’t want help I was hell bent on destroying myself. Things changed just before Christmas 2022 when my best friend took his own life. No reason, just did it.
I couldn’t cope.
I went out, got drunk and found myself with my belt in my hand having frightening thoughts, I didn’t want to do anything, but I didn’t want to have to deal with everything going on. It was then I knew I had to take the help.I asked Sue if I could talk to her one day and that was the start of me working with Residential Resilience.Every Thursday I spent an hour or so with Sue, we talked, I cried, I got angry, I was grieving, I was a drunk I was a mess and I was past caring about anything.Sue would sit and listen, she never judged me she was always so kind, so understanding. She would always make me feel like I wasn’t a lost cause and slowly we put coping mechanisms in place, just small wins which Sue kept a record of, reminded me of them when I lapsed until eventually the small wins were adding up and I began to believe I could change.As time went on, I began to see changes in me. I was still drinking, boredom mostly but with Sues help I started feeling more confident, more positive. When the bad days hit, I would go for a walk, just realising I was more in control made me focus more. I had started to have some contact with my daughter and would look forward to picking her up from school. The days I wasn’t seeing her were hard. Sue encouraged me to join the gym and helped me to find a cheap membership… I mean I couldn’t say I couldn’t do it when I have one of UKs strongest women telling me I could! I started training and 3 days a week I would go to lift weights, Sue helped me with a journal that we worked out if I trained on the weekends I was less likely to drink and have what she calls healthy coping mechanisms… it didn’t feel healthy after leg day though (Jokes).As the 8 weeks resilience was coming to an end, one of the boys at project, a really close mate had moved on but he relapsed and took his own life. It hit me like a truck, and yes, I went to the pub. The next 3 days are a blur. I waited for Sue to arrive at her normal time, thinking she was going to be disappointed.
I had let her down, I had let myself down. We talked for more than the hour that day, no judgement just reassurance, just made me remember all the good I had done, the goals I had smashed and although I had binged that weekend. This was it… we set new achievable goals. It wasn’t starting again from scratch, it was part of the journey. I asked to be referred for a few more sessions and from there I just got stronger, my mental health was feeling more in control and for the first time in a long time, I felt positive.I started a part time job, mowing lawns, doing some cheap labour and was seeing my daughter and my ex-girlfriend most days. I began to enjoy my life and was coping day to day. Fast forward to August 2023 and I am now in my own property. I am working 30 hours and have my daughter 2 to 3 nights a week. Whenever I feel a bit down or I have negative thoughts I go back to my reasons why, my coping mechanisms, my breathing exercises, I go and throw weights about in the gym. Making better life choices. I no longer rely on alcohol.So far I have had 3 relapses, but each time has made me stronger. I am not a failure, I am human. I know my journey is a long one, but I have my BOX OF TRICKS as Sue calls it. I will always be grateful to Cwm Taf Morgannwg Mind, The Residential Resilience project quite literally saved my life. My daughter still has a father. Thank you, Cwm Taf Morgannwg Mind. Thank you, Sue, you are one hell of a woman!
If you or someone you know has been affected by anything in this story, then please feel free to contact us.
Our Chat To Me service is available Monday – Friday 10am – 4pm, and is a non judgmental, completely confidential info line dedicated to providing information and support.
Alternatively, you can also reach out to Samaritans by calling 116 123 which is available 24/7.